Wednesday, October 6, 2010
I love the fall! (Again!)
We took the babies to Jackson's Orchard today. They rode in a red wagon and got to feed the animals at the petting area. Perry laid back on his sister in the wagon, he almost went to sleep. Can't believe she let him lay there! She was good though. He was too. They both got a little pumpkin of their very own. They both also tried to eat it! We bought apples and some cider.
I made apple crisp with the apples. I love a good apple crisp and the Winesap apples from Jackson's make it the best!
Nick's truck is still out of commission. I want so badly to tell him I told you not to do that, but that would just make him mad! I love both my kids, I just want them to learn to take care of themselves and their belongings. I hope his being without his truck all this time helps him take better care of it when he gets it back!
Today marks the 7 month anniversary of Rick leaving us. I continue to miss him like it was yesterday. They say time heals. I don't cry quite as much, but I still miss him as much. It is getting a little easier to be at church too. It is so hard to go there and look at where I last saw him. I know that was just a shell, he is asleep waiting for the Great Day, but it is still the last place I could touch him, see his smiling face. I do have him in my heart. I know we will be together again one day. October seems to remember him. She takes my phone, looks at his picture and says "PaPaw and Tobi" and kisses the phone. She has a picture of him that is just hers too. She is so little. He loved her with all his heart. And I will never forget Christmas eve about midnight when she was just 2 and a half months old. We kept her that night, and it was about midnight with her sleeping on my chest that the Lord promised her salvation to me. It was like He was right there in the living room with us. There are conditions on that. I have to live for Him. I am trying. I really am. Yesterday I talked to Him and He talked back to me. I talk to Him many times a day, it is not every day that I get through to Him though. Yesterday I did. It is the first time in several months. There I said it. I have had this block since Rick's death. I don't know if it is part of grief, or just me. But yesterday I turned up a road just past Heather Miller's house and it came to me to pray. And I did, and I got through. He is still telling me to trust Him. I do, I always have, and always will.
That is all for tonight. I love you all.
To be continued.................