Monday, July 29, 2013

Saturday Night

(Google images)
Saturday night after work I was going home my usual route. It was almost dark. I got to the Minit Mart at Warren East. I am half way home and looking forward to getting there it is almost 8:16, more than a half hour later than normal. I get to Hardees. Moving forward tired. I am almost to the light. Brake lights. Wonder what it is, I can't see. Light is green, what is wrong. Much debris in the road. A helmet? A shoe here, then there another. A motorcycle on the road on its side, pieces here and there. Then I see. Woman from 68-80 running to something in road. It is a man. He isn't moving, she bends over him sobbing - she is hysterical. Someone running to her helping her to her car. I am running to the person in the road with 911 dispatcher on the line. He takes an agonal breath. A few seconds later a second agonal breath. Then no more. He is gone. EMS Dispatcher comes on the phone. A young man comes up and says I know CPR. Another woman does the same.  We follow dispatchers instructions. Then first responders come on scene and help with the CPR. Richardsville and Gott Fire Departments arrive.  EMS supervisor is on scene. It is over. Eleven minutes from the impact. The young man, a lifeguard, desperate to help another human being, is devastated that he cannot help. He tried his best.  He was so sad. The woman was so sad. I was sad. I have seen these situations before but from a first responder side of it. Never as a bystander within seconds of the accident. I pray I am never in that situation again. I am not a first responder anymore for this very reason. This bothers me. I could not sleep Saturday night. I kept seeing the woman from the car hovered over that young man sobbing. Devastated and hysterical. She did not see him. Now, two families are forever changed. Her sobs still haunt me today.

This is the second terrible motorcycle vs. car accident I have seen in the past 3 or 4 years, the first there were serious injuries but no fatalities. In both cases, the car driver simply did not see the cyclist. In both cases, the cyclist had the right of way. In both cases, the driver simply did not see they motorcycle or rider. The first time, I was a first responder and first on scene and had the equipment necessary to assist. Saturday night I was not a first responder. I had no equipment. Had I had equipment, it would not have made a difference, the young man's injuries were fatal. He was alive, riding his motorcycle then in a split second, he was gone. NO warning, no time to prepare. He was gone. Life is that way. We are here then when our time comes, we are gone. Nothing anyone can to to prevent it. If you are not ready for that hour, please do not wait. Get ready today. Now. We cannot escape it. Earlier this year, I was going to work. I was near Houchens on Louisville Road. I was going to change lanes (left to right). No one was behind me or beside me- or so I thought. I checked my mirrors. I looked behind me to my right. I signaled. I started to move over and low and behold a motorcycle rider was riding in my blind spot. I did not see him. I did hear his horn. The road was wide open. He had no reason to be riding in my blind spot. But he was. And I almost hit him. I feel for that woman. I did not see or hear him behind me either. I hesitate to change lanes when driving for that very reason!

January 21, 2010 Rick was in an accident about this same time of night at this very intersection. I was behind him, too. I witnessed the whole thing. Luckily, he was not injured and the people in the car who came out of 68-80 at that red light were not seriously injured. I kept reliving that on Saturday night as it turned into the wee hours of Sunday morning as well. Two days later he would make his last living journey through that light in the back of an ambulance with lights and sirens blaring with a very low oxygen level. You can find the rest of that story in the blog archives from my 2010 posts should you wish. Look to the right of this post.

The book of Matthew Chapter 25 speaks of people helping strangers. I witnessed that Saturday night as I believe one way it was intended. 

Remember me in your prayers and please, please remember the two families involved in this terrible tragedy. Also, please remember that young man who tried so desperately to help. He really gave his best!

I love all y'all
To be continued..........

          Matthew 25
31 When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory:32 And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats:33 And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.34 Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:35 For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Friday, July 26, 2013

Prayers are needed

Several sweet families are hurting. Details are not necessary. Just know they all need our prayers for many, many reasons and the One who can help already knows. Please lift them up with your words of prayer to our Heavenly Father. Please ask for comfort, understanding, peace for all. I thank you.

That is all I have for this day. 
I love all y'all!
To be continued..........

Psalm 119:76Let, I pray thee, thy merciful kindness be for my comfort, according to thy word unto thy servant.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Baking for friends

Today I decided to bake bread for some friends. One friend I've shared part of a loaf with before got a whole loaf today. Another whose husband has been sick got one. She really enjoyed it! Another friend has a sick momma who I sent a loaf to. I feel a bit awkward in a way sending her a loaf of bread, she could cook circles around me when she was well. But maybe she will get just a bit of enjoyment from a warm loaf of white bread. I sure hope so! 
This was about half way thru the first rise
Coming out of the bowl at the end of the first rise lol! 
Set to rise in the pans
In the oven to bake! 

I kept a loaf for Nick and me and had a ham sandwich with mine and stayed within my carb limit!

I enjoy baking. I enjoy when others get good out of something I tried to do! 

I love all y'all!❤
To be continued........

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Life: It's a blessing!

One thing I have learned over the years as a nurse is that all life is precious. Sometime it is sad to see folks lying in their beds in the hospital so sick and no one ever visits. They may smile but they have such a sad look about them. Sometimes I just stand in the room or even sit with them and talk. It seems sometimes that is what they need. Sometimes folks who never chose to marry or maybe married and they are the only one left and they chose to or couldn't have kids and maybe they are an only child so there are no siblings to visit. It is amazing to see how a visit from a loved one helps lift up the spirits of someone lonely. Think about that. Do you know someone in your neighborhood who is lonely? Go see them. When I was growing up, we visited neighbors. We sat on front porches and talked or played in the yard. Go visit! Life is precious!

Last week I saw someone we know. The person has been sick and was visiting family. The person came to the desk before leaving and said: "I just wanted to tell you bye!" That statement made me cry because the person is someone many people love and Rick thought a lot of too and has been very sick. I hope the person meant bye for that visit and not because they thought the end was near. It makes me afraid and sad and I have tried to remember that person in my prayers. I ask you to remember the person too. God knows exactly who I mean.

Enjoy your summer! School will be starting soon! You can't let it go by without enjoying the time! The older I get the more I am amazed by how quickly time passes! 

I love all y'all!
To be continued.....

*all images copied from GOOGLE internet images

Monday, July 15, 2013

It's an interesting journey!

This life has so many ups and downs and changes all around. Some days we don't know which end is up and which is down. One thing I do know is if I trust in my Lord and try my best to do His will, I will not have so many issues hounding me. I have not done that so much the past few months. I have let thing bother me that normally I would have let roll off my back. I have had so many changes and sometimes don't really know what to do. Some days I want to sell it all and find a little place where I can just be me. Then I think, I am me right where I am. What I need to do is be happy with what I am doing where I am right now.

With all these health issues and changes, I have started a different blog: Just Me Myra My Journey with Change. It is linked in the blog list to the left of this post if you care to take a look, it is there. In it, I will journal my successes and failures as honestly as possible. If you read it and care to comment, you are most welcome. I prefer constructive criticism, not derogatory comments! Those type will be deleted! Certainly, everyone has their right to their own thoughts, but since these are my blog posts, and you are certainly free to read or not read, negativity will not be left on the page! I have an app on my iPhone which I am using to help me keep up with my carbs, proteins, sodium etc until I get used to it. It also tracks successes for me if I enter them. If you would like to begin a journey of your own, several local folks use this app and one friend recommended it to me and so far I like it better than the app I had found and was using the first few days. It is called My Fitness Pal and it is a free app at the app store or message me on facebook and I can send you an invite.

In years past, July would have been a big month for us. July and August were big producers of corn, potatoes, beans and tomatoes. We would spend about 6 hours at the Farmer's Market in Brownsville selling our vegetables. I miss those days. People ask me if I have beans this year. I don't. I can't do that by myself and Nick is too busy with the mowing business to garden too. Rick always did the garden part, I just sold it. I helped a little in the gardening part but Rick and Nick did the most of that. I almost forgot the watermelons! Rick could grow some great melons! So sweet and juicy! And he loved his cantaloupe! I hate that melon but he loved it. I would be putting up beans and corn today if things were different. :)

It is how it was meant to be. God has a plan and it is up to us to try to accept His plan into our lives. Sometimes it isn't easy. That is part of the test!

I love all y'all!
To be continued......
2 of Gamma's kiddos being silly! Love my babies!
Hebrews 11:1-39 - Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. 

Thursday, July 11, 2013

There are days

Sometimes a post or a photo or even a simple thought will trigger specific memories. Right now is no different. A female hummingbird stopped by the feeder. Bandit got all excited about a visiting dog. Then there was a Facebook post with what looked like wonderful homegrown maters. I was taken back 4 years and beyond on days just like this.
It was work! And I miss it. And I miss him.  And if he couldn't be cured, I wouldn't wish him back for anything (even if I could). He's not hurting or struggling for every breath for days on end now. And because of his spot in his garden and his testimony that let me know without a shadow of doubt I will see him again one day. 

Didn't mean to upset or depress anyone. Not looking for sympathy. It's just a feeling I hope you never have to know! But I know some will have to know because it is appointed to us to die. It's in the plan. Doesn't make it hurt less!

I love all y'all!❤
To be continued....

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Mid way through the first day

It's mid day. I'm about half-way through the my first day trying to comply with changes I need to make. I won't go into details about every little thing. I did stop by the Scottsville Road Farmers Market and buy some good peaches from Dunn-Bowen orchard. They are just right. 
I also bought ambrosia corn and tomatoes from vendors there. I cooked green beans for lunch along with cut off corn and sliced tomatoes. And I stayed in compliance. 

I've had lots of water today and if you know me very well, you know how difficult that is for me. Another difficult thing is because of the mildly elevated blood sugar and Dr imposed diabetic diet, no more real coke. Poo. And, because of my self-imposed aspartame ban no coke zero or diet coke. Diet Rite is nasty in case you didn't know. My mom and dad drink it every day. I've had one glass of it. Didn't like it. It may grow on me. We'll see. The LASIX (water pill for my non medical friends) is keeping me busy and my chest/throat tightness is better today. Yay! Gotta run back to town to pick up my Clonidine (bp pill) since I forgot to pick it up. 

I love all yall❤
To be continued......

Monday, July 8, 2013

Checking out the shortness of breath

So I have been having progressively more shortness of breath over the past several weeks. The past few days have been the worst yet with Friday and Friday night being the worst so far. Friday I became very diaphoretic (sweaty with cool skin) with profound shortness of breath and chest, throat and arm tightness while at work. I attributed it to hormones (hot flashes) but it got better with rest. I kept that in the back of my mind though. Friday night after I went to bed with my CPAP on, the tightness returned. I debated and took a nitroglycerin tablet which helped enough to let me sleep. Saturday morning the sweaty clammy thing happened again and resolved with rest. I tried to hide how I felt from our guests. We had a good time Saturday night. Sunday I was so short of breath I called in sick for today with intentions to go see Dr Avula this morning. I missed church and haven't heard how the service went. Breathing was just too short. Today I called and Dr Avula was out. David (his Physicians Assistant) was in so I made an appointment to see David. I didn't know Dr Collins was there and saw him. He explained about the diastolic dysfunction not letting my heart rest enough and since heart arteries are fed during rest, even open arteries suffer from lack of time to fill. He said the nitro was the correct thing to have done (relaxes smooth muscle lowering BP) the other night and added Clonidine to help with the relaxation phase of the heartbeat and lower my blood pressure. He also told me to take my as needed LASIX a little more right now until I'm less short of breath. He also insisted on my getting my blood sugar (only a bit high at 118) down some and my cholesterol (240!!!) down a lot! 

So, with a little compliance on my part, this will get better! 

I love all y'all! ❤
To be continued.....

Sunday, July 7, 2013

A good day

Yesterday was a good day. Nick and I had family and friends who are like family over for a late afternoon cookout and fireworks at dusk. I didn't count how many came but there were several here. We had lots of good food and desserts and a pretty fireworks show. I believe everyone had a great time. If anyone was hungry, it was their own fault! 
(Photo from google images)

For the past few days I have been so very short of breath. It is now to the point I can not walk and talk at the same time. I get very diaphoretic doing any task home or work. I am a little worried. Friday night it was also accompanied by chest throat and arm heaviness. I took a nitro tablet I've had around for a few years but it was still good. I know this because it took the top of my head off. It eased the heaviness too. I slept we'll last night but had to take a nap this afternoon. My CPAP helps a little with the shortness of breath. In fact, I'm about to go back to bed now. I did call in to work tomorrow. I will be trying to get into Dr Avula tomorrow. We will see what he says. It's just been a little over a year since I had a heart cath that said the arteries were pretty good. They don't clog up in this short amount of time generally. We will see tomorrow. 

I love all y'all! ❤
To be continued......

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

The very best memories!

Today would have been the 28 year anniversary of being married to Rick. I won't tell you that our life together was all roses because it wasn't. But it was our life together. When I said "I do" I meant it. For better or worse, richer or poorer. And we had a lot of all of it. Good, bad, certainly poorer! There's a story about before Val was born ALL we had to eat was a couple bullion cubes, onion flakes and 3 or 4 taters. I made tater soup. Rick, in his infinite wisdom, decided it needed more pepper. He added so much pepper we couldn't eat it! Needless to say, we went to moms for a few days! And especially our last several years we had the riches of a happy home. While we had trials for sure, those last several years Rick had The Lord in his heart and it was our best years together. Remember richer doesn't necessarily mean financially! For our 24th anniversary, he bought me the frame in the picture below. For our 25th anniversary, we planned to renew our vows in front of our friends and family. God, however, needed Rick more than I. He took him home just shy of 4 months from that 25th anniversary. 
It's ok though because God knows what He needs and our needs and He has and will take care of us. And though I miss Rick everyday, I miss him more on those anniversary of's. 

So for this day I will not cry it away. I will remember the good times. The times of joy. The times our home was full of family and friends at one of our dinners. The children growing up. The times it was just us here. The times Tobi would be here. She was certainly papaw's girl just like her mommy was daddy's girl. Both had Rick wrapped around their little finger. 
Valarie was almost 5 in the photo; Nick was about 2 months old. 

Papaw and "T-T-T Tobers". Can you tell she was his world?!  He doesn't look like that in just a few months he would be diagnosed with a brain tumor and would be gone in less than a year does he?! Please remember life is short at best and tell those you love how you feel. Better still, show them how you feel. Then they will know! The only thing that I can think of that would have made our last years better would have been to have found Ricks son Greg. We tried to find him that last summer. So glad he found us! No regrets though. No what ifs. God didn't intend it any other way!

Our family circle may be broken now, but one day it will be complete once again!

If I could go back and do it all over again I would not hesitate!

I love all y'all! ❤
To be continued......

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

28 years today

This was my view on my way home from work last night. The picture does not do it justice the way the sun was shining from behind that cloud was almost majestic. I don't know how you can see something like that and not believe in God!

This was my view on my way to work yesterday morning. This is at the end of my driveway. I haven't seen water coming over the road like that but once since we redid the driveway back in 1998. Remember all that water Norma? 

This was the same area just in front of me and the "new" way out. I used to have to cross all that water every time it rained more than a .5 inch at a time and last night when I got home, I emptied 4 inches of water from my rain gauge.

28 years ago today I was Myra James engaged to Rick Sanders. My neighbors and co-workers thought he was way too old for me. I was 26 years old. He was 37. I met him the October before. I knew I would marry him the day I met him. I really didn't see the age difference. When I take care of a patient the born the same year as Rick, I see someone older than me. I really didn't see him that way.  If you have read this blog, you know that story- or most of it. 28 years ago to day would be my last day with the last name of James. Now here I am 28 years later still a Sanders. Many people including some family said it would never last and there were a few times I wondered but we always managed to work through our problems. Sometimes I have wishes that things were different.  I know in everything there is a plan. I just don't know what that plan is for me right now.

When you go to pray, I ask you to remember a friend (and her  mother and brothers) whose mother has been diagnosed with cancer in her lung, liver and rib. She is a good woman and I have only gotten to know her this past year or so. I have always known of her, but never really spent much time with her until her daughter married and moved into our community. I (as many others) feel we have always known our friend and her family is precious to us. We ask for you to remember them in your prayers. God knows all about it and knows the situation. 

     Philippians 4
Rejoice in the Lord always: and again I say, Rejoice.
Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.
Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.
19 But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.
20 Now unto God and our Father be glory for ever and ever. Amen
I love all y'all
To be continued........