♥ More thoughts.......

While you have likely seen this photo as my profile picture right now on facebook, I will tell you a little story about this time in my life. This was in 1978. I was a student at Glasgow School for Practical Nurses, which became Glasgow School for Health Occupations. I think it is now part of the vo-tech system in Bowling Green, and they recently added an RN program there. I was 19 years old in May of that year. I had wanted to be a nurse from as far back as I could remember. I had applied to school, had an interview, and was chosen as an alternate. I thought I would not get in. I had an interview for a factory job in Bowling Green, it was at Firestone. The day before my interview in July of 1977, I found out I could start nursing school in August. WOW! I got in. I was so very excited and scared at the same time. I was painfully shy. I was told I would have to get over it. Hum. How do you do that? I had only once been out of the state of KY at that time and the only times I'd been out of the Edmonson County area were few! My friends from 1st grade and I would go to Cave City and if we were lucky we would get to go to Glasgow. And if it was really special we could go to Bowling Green, but a parent had to be with us for that. We weren't allowed to drive all the way to Bowling Green. We hung out at the Dairy Queen between Cave City and Horse Cave. It is still there in the same place. The building next to it was a skating rink; however, we weren't allowed there.

I stated nursing school with my cousin Donna. We were only a couple of weeks into school when on August 16, 1977 we heard the news Elvis Presley was dead....and I'm pretty sure Donna and I heard it on the radio on the way to class. It was the talk of the morning. It was very difficult to concentrate on school with the King of Rock and Roll having just died! But we had good teachers, they let us talk a little about it then we had to hit the books. In LPN school then, we had 6 weeks of straight class at some point we started having skills labs. I can not remember how that went though. We were there just like a "day shift" back then, 7am to 3pm. And they were strict about it too! And we had evaluations after we started clinicals a lot like the evaluations we receive now. And passing school depended on GPA and our evaluations. We had to be on the floor at 7 am and get our assignments. WOW. It was amazing to me. My cousin Donna was a CNA for a year before we got into school, so she knew a lot about it before I got there. I wanted to learn everything I could soak in. When the doctors would round, the other students would hide. I wanted to learn. I even asked some of them questions. I wanted to know and they took the time to answer sometimes. On one of our last days of school we were finished with clinicals, we were wrapping up testing preparing for boards and graduation, we had a picnic. At the picnic, they had an awards ceremony. I received an award for "making rounds with the doctors" and it hurt my feelings so very badly. They meant it as a joke, but it actually hurt my feelings. I wouldn't go up and get it. I don't know if they knew they hurt me or not--it does not matter really, I wouldn't change a thing. I am not holding a grudge over it, but I do remember it.

I remained very shy for 2 or 3 years after graduation. I was still shy when I was accepted to WKU 2 years after getting out of LPN school. I did eventually get over it for the most part. I do still blush on occasion. There are still things I do not like to discuss. Goes back to how I was raised I think. There were things never spoken but you knew. I don't know if you know what I mean or not. I do.

I graduated from RN school in December 1981. I had been working in CCU since August of 1980, and after graduation, nothing really changed except the way I signed my name. Things were quite different back then compared to now.

I really didn't date much, didn't expect to ever marry. There is a previous post that describes how Rick and I met. He was the person who I knew the minute I met him that I would marry him. I had never thought that before. And it happened. And it was a good life. And I miss him.

I went to the doctor yesterday. I have not slept over 4 hours a night since he was diagnosed with the tumor. I have been feeling very short of breath but different than in the past. I thought it was heat related. I am very intolerant to heat. Also been having many palpitations I blamed on my thyroid as well as more than usual esophageal spasms. I mainly went because I am exhausted. I can not sleep more than a couple hours at a time and not over 4 hours per night. He ordered some labs and a chest xray and EKG both of which were fine. Labs are still pending. I think they will be OK too, though. He believes it is just anxiety. I tend to agree. It goes along with not sleeping. Rick's death is not the only trauma we have suffered. In the past year we have had one nurse with breast cancer, another with her husband diagnosed with lung cancer, and another with pulmonary hypertension. That pulmonary hypertension is not something you want to hear. It is a serious illness and she is the sweetest girl you could want to meet with a husband who has the faith of Daniel. (See Bible Daniel 6 : 1-28)And they have the sweetest almost 3 year old daughter. Please pray for her-pray that her medication will get adjusted so she can breathe and take care of that precious child. Anyway, I told all this to Dr. Phillips, he smiled, gave me a hug and said "I will fix you just remember, this will take time for you to get over his loss." So, he gave me some things to help me. I believe it will work. I had hoped writing here would help, and it has but not as quickly as I would like. Unless you have lost a spouse, you have no idea what I am feeling. In 1 and 1/2 weeks we would have been married 25 years. I think that is part of this now.

That is all for tonight. Take care, watch what you say about people and how you say it. Don't be a part of rumor. Love your neighbors.

To be continued......... ♥