I started a different blog

I have started a new blog. It is called The Next Chapter. I am not too sure how much writing in this one I will be doing, I think it depends on the topic for the day. I am not going to close this blog, it holds so many memories. It holds healing for myself and some of my sisters in law, I think. And if it has helped anyone else, then I am even more blessed. All I want to do is help someone somehow!

I do ask you to remember in prayer the sick, the folks who have lost loved ones, the folks who have loved ones in critical condition......

Please remember our church family as we get ready to elect a new pastor in less than 2 weeks. And our neighbor church in a month when they have been charged to do the same thing!

I want to remind you that just because I have another blog does not mean I have changed the way I feel about Rick. I just will reserve this blog for posts relating to the grief and things going on around those feelings and the new blog will be devoted to new stuff, everyday stuff. I don't know if I will keep it, I just wanted to change it up a little-to grow and evolve......


And if it seem evil unto you to serve the Lord, choose ye this day whom ye will serve...but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. (Joshua 24:15)

I love y'all!
To be continued...........

A great Saturday!

I love hummingbirds, everyday that I see one is a good day!!

140 days until Christmas Day!

I didn't sleep too well last night, still awake at 1:30 this morning, that is the last thing I remember, up to the bathroom at 4am, back to sleep and awake for good at 6:30 am with 2 babies climbing into Gamma's bed. They were so sweet! I was just so sleepy! Val made pancakes for breakfast. I ate them, they were pretty good. Next thing I went to Bowling Green around 11am and before I got where I was going, I had another of those episodes just like the last time I ate pancakes, arms and legs so weak I could barely drive, trembling, very clammy, my clothes and hair were wet from the sweating, then I looked in the mirror, face very pale with a pale "ring" around my mouth. I pulled into McDonald's drive through and got a frozen strawberry lemonade, I thought with all the sugar that has to have in it surely I would feel better quickly. I pulled over and drank that and after 15 minutes I was still very trembly. I decided to go into Riley's bakery and got a chicken salad sandwich. That took another 10 minutes to make me feel better. Why does this not happen to me when I can have my blood sugar checked? I am fine now.

While I was driving to town, I was thinking about all the sadness in the community over the past few weeks. The young man Jacob Irwin, a friend at work's son and nephew, a friend at work's cousin, another friend at work's father-in-law, a high school friend, a mother/daughter co-worker's mother/grandmother, some died from cancer, some from accidents, some other reasons, and the one thing that is common is they are all feeling loss and grief. And they all have one thing in common, a loving God to comfort them. There is more sickness out there. We never know when the next time we said bye to someone will be their last. remember to tell them how you feel! And remember your friends, neighbors, relatives, everyone in prayer!

1 Corinthians 13
¹Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.

²And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.

³And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

⁴Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,

⁵Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

⁶Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

⁷Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

⁸Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.

⁹For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.

¹⁰But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.

¹¹When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

¹²For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

¹³And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.

You know, this has nothing to do with what I was writing, but it is what I needed to post. I do love this scripture....but as I re-read it, it is perfect. As it should be!

I love y'all!
To be continued.............

The weekend is mine!

I am so very happy that the weekend is finally here! I am off for 2 whole days! YAY!!!! Do you think I am happy about it? Well, I am! We have church Sunday night. I am looking forward to it!

I don't know what I did to this blog thing, but I do not like the way it posts now! I want to go back to the old way! It is difficult to move from one paragraph to the next.

YAY!! I figured it out! I had clicked an updated thingy and unclicked it and now I can speed type to my hearts content!!

Y'all didn't need to know about that did you. LOL!

I was checking the blog stats before I started writing, and I am in awe! I feel blessed and honored that 5022 times this blog has been read since I started writing June 1, 2010. If you are new to it, then I will tell you that the original intent of this blog was a place to write my feelings to help me deal with the death of my husband (hence the title Rick and Myra) then a friend at work who read it said she wanted to read how our story began, so I wrote that, and now I still write about my feelings around his illness and death, but I also write about my feelings in general. I have not even considered changing the name, because although he is gone, he will forever be part of me. I married him until death us do part, and tho we are now parted by death, he still is in my heart and will be for a long, long time.

So today I read something a dear friend posted on my wall:

TRUE FRIENDS are ALWAYS there for each other, thru thick and thin, work and play, laughter and tears!!!!! You don't have to see each other or talk to each other every day because you know all you have to do is call and they will be there!!

And it is so true with her and several more friends....we can go for weeks without seeing each other or calling or sometimes even months and the next time we see each other it is like no time has passed. They know all they have to do is let me know and I am there, and I know all I have to do is let them know and they are there for me too! I can think of nothing sweeter!

I would ask again for your prayers for my friends having struggles right now. I will remember them and y'all as well! We should remember each other in our prayers.

James 5:16
“Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.”

I know I need the prayers of those I love and I try to remember those I love in my prayers. Think that is all for tonight, I hope y'all have a great weekend!

I love y'all!
To be continued..............

So much has changed in the world!

142 days until Christmas Day!

So much has changed in the world since my last post. Yesterday afternoon, late, I found out a friend of mine lost her son and nephew in a terrible one car crash yesterday morning. She was at work, had heard about the accident, had tried to call her son. Of course, he could not answer. I can not imagine the loss of a child~~no matter how old!  Having lost 4 pregnancies, I know that pain, but to love a child for x number of years then lose him or her to a tragedy........please remember that family in your prayers! Please!

Also, yesterday I learned a family member had a problem that he is dealing with. I believe by the grace of God, he will be able to deal with his problem and overcome it! He is a strong, good man who realized there was something wrong and he needed to work on it. He has started his journey in an open honest manner, and I believe he will succeed. I will remember him in my prayers, and I ask you to as well! There is no need to mention names here, God knows all things! This is not a post for gossip! This is a place to vent feelings and ask my friends for help! I am asking! We all have problems, we all need help sometimes! It is not up to us to judge anyone over anything.......
           
           Matthew 7

 ¹Judge not, that ye be not judged.
 ²For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
 ³And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
 ⁴Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye?
 ⁵Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.
 ⁶Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.
 ⁷Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you:
 ⁸For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened           

On another note, the pump was removed and I was able to come home early, but only because we had moved out a few patients.....yay me!

Blogger has changed some things.....I don't like this at all! It is much harder to write! I might get used to it! I hope so, I enjoyed this, but when I need to make a new paragraph, it does not cooperate!

I think this is all for tonight!

I love y'all!
To be continued...........

Dreams sometimes seem so real!

143 days until Christmas Day in case you were wondering..........

Last night/early this morning I had a dream, which is a rare circumstance these days. I woke thinking about it, glad in one way I had a dream because it means you are really asleep when you dream, also sad in a way because of the dream that it was, and glad in another way because of the dream it was, it was so real. I could smell his cologne, feel his arms around me. I dreamed Rick and I were driving "through the hollar" between here and Brownsville. We were close to Brownsville, around Oak Grove, and coming towards home. We were talking about running out of gas for some reason. We were in the old red Buick we used to have. I did get to tell him I love him before I woke. It seemed so real at the time. Maybe in some way it was God's way of letting me know everything would be ok? I know he is ok. He isn't hurting anymore. He isn't struggling for each breath. :) I guess that doesn't change the fact that I miss him so much still, just like yesterday and the day before that too......and month before that, you get the idea. But then again, I would not have him back just to suffer! If I could have him healthy, I would but not like it was. He suffered so much. Some of you were there and saw parts of it. Sometimes, I would just look up and the support was there! There were many supporting us! I could not leave anyone out! We had so much help, love and support! I will be hard pressed to repay all the love and kindness shown! (and still is being shown!) You all know who you are! We love each and every one of you! There were many of you who were with us in spirit who had other obligations and could not be with us physically! We know you were there for us too (and still are)! We could feel the strength from your prayers!

Judges 7:13

King James Version (KJV)

¹³And when Gideon was come, behold, there was a man that told a dream unto his fellow, and said, Behold, I dreamed a dream, and, lo, a cake of barley bread tumbled into the host of Midian, and came unto a tent, and smote it that it fell, and overturned it, that the tent lay along.

On a lighter note! It is hot today! I can't believe how hot it is.....and here we are complaining and in about 6 weeks, we will start complaining about how cold it is getting. We are never happy are we!

It is 10 am on Wednesday. In one week, I get my CPAP mask, at least I hope I do, I go to the Dr. that day. I hope that's the plan. I have no experience in this matter! I guess I will find out!

I love y'all!
To be continued...............

144 ......

Have you every thought about how you can make your day good or bad by the attitude you take into it? Well, I am here to tell you you can.....especially in the work of service, and yes, nursing fits into that category! As do store clerks, waitresses, and many other professions! If I go to work with the attitude that I am going to have a bad day, I usually do, if I go into it with the attitude that I am going to have a good day, then I usually do regardless of how busy it gets. There is a prayer called the Serenity Prayer that goes like this:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.

One of my supervisors once said (to me because I was upset about something) "you can catch more flies with sugar than you can with vinegar"--that got me to thinking how what was happening was something I could not do anything about, and asking her for what I needed was the right thing to do even though there was nothing she could do to help me. I would just have to do the best I could with what I had and make due. The thing that got me was how I reacted to the situation directly influenced the people I was working with and others around, and how if my attitude was more positive, much would improve! She never said it in those words. From that day forward, I make an effort to start out each day with a positive attitude. I also find when I am around many negative individuals, it rubs off on those around. I don't want to be in that situation. I want things to be positive. Change is part of life and change in the medical world is part of our work life. Rules change and we have to be flexible with those changes, do what is best for our patients and if the "evidence" says something works better this way or that way and we opt to change our practice through policies and procedures, then that is how it should be. Period. And we must adapt, somewhat like the Borg from Star Trek. Resistance is futile. We must adapt our work lives and habits to service our patients to the best of our ability for their benefit. That is what I became a nurse for....to help patients back to a healthy state and that is what they pay me for. Period.

Enough of that soap box. I am still having a little trouble believing this is really August already! This year has flown by. I feel the older I get, the quicker the years pass. In all reality, that can not be you know, but it seems that way! It still takes 365 days for a year to pass and there are 24 hours in a day, but it does seem that way lol.

Notice that the days are getting shorter lol! They are you know.....a minute here and a minute there......sunrise a minute later each day or two and sunset a minute earlier each day or two....it will be dark until seven am before too long and dark by five pm before too long.....then CHRISTMAS!!

I love y'all!
To be continued..................

145 and counting

I can not believe it is August first! And that day is almost over......The year is way over half over! Where did it go? Christmas is 145 days away, can't believe it! I am so far behind on many projects! I hope to get those caught up within the next couple weeks! I guess I am a procrastinator! I just don't understand sometimes how time flies and I get farther and farther behind! I guess I will just laugh it off.

Last night after I got home from work, I got a message from my friend Sandy that our pastor is not going to stay with us. We have a couple weeks to get ready to call a new pastor. I am not surprised, because I had a feeling about it. I do wish he could stay, but his lead is gone and when it is over, it is over. At this point, I don't have a strong lead for any particular person. I had the same thing happen last year, and if it does not get stronger, I will not participate in the voting. And, of course, if it does get stronger, it will remain between me and the Lord. I don't believe in electioneering for pastor. I believe the Lord sends the lead to the preacher, he knows where he is supposed to be and the church, if they are up on their praying will know who to call. Anything less can lead to chaos and dissension in the church. That is not how I want to serve the Lord! I haven't had a strong lead for pastor in quite a while. I did (as did many others) when Brother Steve was there, and really did not when he left. I knew (as did several others) he was going to leave, but did not have a strong lead one way or another, but the lead I felt was too weak to use was the man they called......I do know I should have "listened" to that lead. I will try to pray to strengthen what I feel, and if it doesn't get stronger, I will have to decide what I am going to do.

Acts 1:24-26

King James Version (KJV)

²⁴And they prayed, and said, Thou, Lord, which knowest the hearts of all men, shew whether of these two thou hast chosen,

²⁵That he may take part of this ministry and apostleship, from which Judas by transgression fell, that he might go to his own place.

²⁶And they gave forth their lots; and the lot fell upon Matthias; and he was numbered with the eleven apostles.

And though we are not calling apostles, we calling the man who will lead us the next year. Please pray for us that we do the right thing. I thought this scripture was appropriate.

I love y'all!
To be continued.................